We all have a natural tendency, whether purposefully or not, to compare ourselves to others, whether online or offline. Such comparisons assist us in assessing our accomplishments, skills, personalities, and emotions. This, in turn, has an impact on how we perceive ourselves.

But what effect do these parallels have on our happiness? It all depends on how much we compare.

Comparing ourselves to those who have it worse than us on social media makes us feel better. Comparing ourselves to those who are performing better than us, on the other hand, makes us feel inferior or insufficient. The social media platform we use, as well as crisis scenarios like the COVID-19 outbreak, have an impact on our morale.

As a psychology Ph.D. student, I’m researching incels or males who believe that rejection by women is the cause of their involuntary celibacy. In the age of social media, I believe that social comparison, which affects our overall well-being as much as it does in the general population, has an impact on our general well-being.

The best level of comparison

Individuals’ motivation is said to be influenced by how much they compare themselves to others. Researchers from Ruhr University in Bochum, Germany, discovered that there is an optimal amount of perceived difference between oneself and others that maximize the impacts of social comparison.

A woman sits on a sofa, one hand holding a cell phone, the other supporting her head in anguish.
People feel inferior, dissatisfied, or inadequate when they compare themselves to others who appear to be better off. (Shutterstock) If we believe we are considered superior to others, we will be unmotivated to develop because we already believe we are in a wonderful position. However, if we believe we are inferior, we will be unmotivated to grow because the objective appears to be too impossible to reach.

In other words, beyond or below the optimal amount of perceived difference between oneself and another, a person no longer exerts any effort, according to the study. Individuals who perceive themselves as inferior will experience unpleasant emotions, guilt, and diminished pride and self-esteem.

Social media comparisons that aren’t accurate and unrealistic

As a result, social comparisons have an impact on our behavior as well as our mental health. Comparing yourself to others during a restaurant dinner, on the other hand, does not always have the same impact as comparing yourself to others on Facebook. On a social media platform, it is easier to create an interesting existence or inflate certain aspects of things than it is in real life.

Many experts believe that the introduction of social media, which allows us to post content in which we always appear in our best light, has amplified unfair comparisons.

According to studies, the more time people spend on Facebook and Instagram, the more socially they compare themselves. This social comparison has been associated with poorer self-esteem and increased social anxiety, among other factors.

According to a study conducted by researchers at the National University of Singapore, these results are explained by the fact that people on social media often post good information about themselves. They can also improve their image by applying filters that provide the sense of a large gap between themselves and others.

As a result, Facebook researchers discovered that the more users looked at content on the network where others were discussing positive elements of their lives, the more inclined they were to compare themselves to others.

COVID-19: Social comparisons are less negative

Could the impact of this comparison be different in a high-stress situation like the COVID-19 pandemic?

According to researchers from Kore University in Enna, Italy, high levels of online social comparison were linked to more distress, loneliness, and a less happy existence before the lockdowns. During lockdowns, however, this was no longer the case.

One reason for this could be because people believed they were sharing the same terrible experience by comparing themselves to others during the lockdown. As a result, the detrimental effects of social comparisons were lessened. So, during difficult circumstances, comparing oneself to others online can be a beneficial force for developing relationships and sharing experiences of dread and uncertainty.

Depending on the social media, a different effect is produced.

Depending on which social media site a person uses, there are distinctions to be made. Social media sites should not be grouped, according to researchers from the University of Lorraine in France.

The use of Facebook and Instagram, for example, is linked to decreased happiness, whereas Twitter is linked to more positive emotions and higher life satisfaction. One probable explanation is that, unlike Twitter, where it is more suitable to communicate one’s true ideas and emotions, Facebook and Instagram are known to be platforms for good self-presentation.

Utilizing social media to seek social support during the COVID-19 epidemic may reawaken rather than release negative emotions, depending on the social media site a person is using.

Many factors encourage us to socially compare ourselves. Social media, whether we like it or not, exposes us to more of those incentives. When we are self-evaluating, we tend to refer to the type of content that is being provided, whether it is positive or bad. It’s fantastic to share content that makes us feel good about ourselves and earns us praise from others, but you must consider the impact these posts will have on others.

Nonetheless, I believe that communicating your problems via words, photographs, or films can have a beneficial impact and provide psychological advantages.